


Understanding

by Babybucky1943



Series: Collared [5]
Category: Marvel D/s AU
Genre: M/M, Past Abuse, Trust, Wetting, changing, collar symbolism
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-08
Updated: 2019-02-08
Packaged: 2019-10-24 06:47:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,354
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17699600
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Babybucky1943/pseuds/Babybucky1943
Summary: Is Bucky finally getting it that Steve isn’t going to hurt him?





	Understanding

Bucky slowly came to himself, feeling warm and relaxed. He placed his flesh hand on the solid chest under him. Steve. He vaguely remembered dropping but he was okay now and he felt safe. Something he hadn’t actually _FELT_ in forever. He raised himself up on his knees, still tucked snugly against Steve’s thighs. His jeans were loose enough to be comfortable. Usually during sub drop he was stripped but obviously something had happened. 

Steve was sleeping soundly, his face relaxed, mouth tipped up slightly like he was having a good dream.

Bucky spotted the water bottle and realized how thirsty he was. Would he be allowed? He reached for it then pulled his hand back.

He licked his lips, then squirmed a little trying to decide if he should wake Steve. He touched Steve’s muscular bicep with some awe. His dom was strong. He’d already known that by how effortlessly he picked Bucky up and carried him. He was a Captain. 

Steve moved, stretched and lifted his head. “Hi baby.” His smile was immediate.

Bucky swallowed and licked his lips. For the first time since coming here, he saw that Steve’s eyes were a bright blue.

“Sir,” he cleared his throat. “May I have a drink?” His words were still almost whispered but he wasn’t scared that Steve was going to hit him.

Steve rubbed a knuckle softly over his rosy cheek. “You don’t need to ask, darling. Yes. Of course.” He popped the cap off and gave Bucky the bottle.

Bucky tipped it back, drinking deeply, then sat up straight again, swiping a hand over his mouth. “Thank you.” He shyly met Steve’s eyes.

Steve kissed his forehead. “You look better. How do you feel?” His eye caught Bucky’s pulse fluttering in his throat. 

“I feel different,” Bucky said, “Like maybe I’m finally safe.” He chewed his lip and played with his T-shirt wrapping his metal hand in the bottom and rolling it up. He wasn’t able to look at Steve for fear he’d spoken out of turn. 

Steve lightly poked his bare belly. “You are safe.”

Bucky smiled, actually smiled, his stomach twitching away at the contact. 

Steve melted at the smile. He put the recliner down with a thud. He needed to keep his mind clear and platonic. “You dry, baby boy?”

Bucky paused then blushed, shaking his head. 

Steve got up, setting him on the floor. “I’ll get you a clean pull-up and you can go to the bathroom.”

Bucky ran softly as soon as Steve’s back was turned. He hurried to the bathroom before Steve could change his mind. He wasn’t sure about that yet. It had been done to him for so long, even being dropped as well as Steve had, he still didn’t have full trust in him.

He wasn’t done when Steve popped his head in, startling him and making him burst into sudden tears.

“I’m sorry, honey,” Steve apologized profusely. “I was just bringing a clean pull-up.”

Bucky nodded, drying his tears. “You just startled me.”

Steve lay down the clean underwear. “You want me to stay?” 

Bucky heaved a shuddering sigh and shook his head. “I’ll be okay.”

Steve closed the door gently and went to make lunch. He berated himself for not approaching differently. He knew Bucky startled easily. 

Bucky changed and washed his hands then tiptoed to the kitchen where he could hear Steve banging pots and pans. It was so weird being allowed to walk around without a leash on or being tied down when he wasn’t “in use”.

Steve turned when he heard him come in. “There’s my boy.”

Bucky really liked all the pet names Steve used. They didn’t seem forced. They just flowed naturally and made him feel wanted. He took the time to really study his dom as he was making lunch.

His head felt clearer than it had in awhile. His hormones were at rest.

Steve was a big guy. His chest strained his T-shirt. He was solid. He was...Captain America.

Bucky had known it but hadn’t actually really thought about that till right now. Not that he’d ever really thought about the Avengers. They’d been so far out of the social circles that his doms travelled in.

Steve’s blue jeans were snug. Bucky glanced at his ass. It was nice  but he wasn’t attracted. Sex held no appeal for him right now. His last dom had hurt him so badly last week with things that shouldn’t be done he’d needed medical attention again and it hadn’t been a one time thing either.

Bucky figured if he had a choice about never getting fucked again he was fine with it!!

Steve had stopped moving, watching his perusal. “What are you looking at?”

“Seeing you,” Bucky said shyly. He licked his lips nervously. “Can you tell me again what this- what your- my- collar means?” He fingered the soft leather again.

Steve sat on a chair and patted his knee.

Bucky came and sat on his knee, keeping his eyes averted, carefully submissive.

Steve slowly tipped his chin up. “This collar,” he said, his voice soft and deep, “Symbolizes my promise to look after you, to meet all your needs to the best of my abilities for as long as you want me to. The heart in it symbolizes my desire to love you.”

Bucky couldn’t quite process all the good things that meant. The love, not sure about. He hesitantly cuddled into Steve’s shoulder. “Okay.” 

Steve kissed his forehead, wrapping his strong arms around Bucky’s shoulders and making him feel completely safe.

Several minutes passed in sweet silence then Steve said, “I love holding you but if I don’t stir the spaghetti we won’t be able to eat it.” He grinned, kissing Bucky’s cheek and setting him down with a pat on his ass.

Bucky stood there uncertainly, watching Steve. His feelings were so out of order today. Or perhaps more, **_in_** order.

Finally Steve dished up the spaghetti and sauce and set Bucky’s plate in front of him.

They ate in silence for a few minutes and then Steve asked Bucky what he liked to do.

Bucky gave him a blank look. “Do?”

“In your spare time, yeah. Movies? Drawing? Music?”

Bucky felt the familiar anxiety squish his stomach so tight he had to stop eating. “I didn’t really uh have spare time.”

Steve’s brow furrowed. “None?”

Bucky felt like he’d said the wrong thing when he saw Steve’s worried frown. Could he take it back? He started to feel sick. He shrugged. His other doms hadn’t allowed him any free time.

“What do you want to do this afternoon?” Steve asked, noting the pinched look on Bucky’s face and trying to make it easier to answer. “Anything you want.”

Bucky had no idea what to say.He tried to remember what Steve had just given him as options. “Movies?” His doms had watched movies sometimes.

“Sure. What kind of movies do you like?” Steve looked at him with open interest.

Damn! More questions. He was starting to panic. “Uhh with shooting. And bad guys?” That was all he really knew about movies.

Steve giggled a little. “Alright! Action movies. My favourite too!”

Bucky felt a little thrill. He’d said something good! He followed Steve to the living room, looking at the movie selection on the tv screen. He didn’t know what any of the titles represented, so when Steve asked, he told him, “You pick.”

When the movie started, Steve sat on the couch, patting the seat beside him.

Bucky slowly inched a bit closer, and put his head tentatively on Steve’s shoulder. This was becoming familiar. He liked it. Steve didn’t grab him or yank him closer. It was a safe thing to do. 

Steve kissed the top of Bucky’s head. He felt like they’d reached a bit of an understanding this afternoon.Bucky was beginning to understand that Steve wasn’t going to hurt him and Steve was learning that having a sub was more than just being a strong person.  It was about understanding the person depending on you too. 

 


End file.
